Dear Crutches,

i have to admit you look quite fancy with your bright red handles, your long, silver bodies and your little red shoes, but now that i have to rely on you approximately 18 hours a day, would you mind thinking about making the next generation a bit more comfortable?!
not that i mind having arms like Schwarzenegger, but the heels of my hands could really use a break. really. i mean it.
i would appreciate it if you took my request into consideration and will be waiting for your answer.

sincerely,
your owner

ouch.