sometimes, everything just feels… wrong.
you wake up with that unsettling feeling in your stomach and no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to shake it off. in fact, it just keeps getting worse – the more you think about it. like a little scratch… you know you shouldn’t pick it to let it heal, but you don’t like the scab, you can’t leave it alone… so you pick it anyways. and of course, that doesn’t help the healing process.
today, my mind is playing tricks on me. for some reason, i feel really small, tiny in fact, and i don’t know how to get rid of the feeling. so, instead of letting it go, i poke and prod – and make it a bigger problem instead.
stupid, isn’t it?!
yeah, i know.
i try and try to find the reason for this feeling… why it came up and what triggered it, but no matter how hard i think about it, i can’t place it. like i’m blind… or not wanting to see.
wish me luck on my quest… if i can’t find out what it is, at least i hope i have the strength to just let it slide.
insecurity maybe? i don’t know…
yeah, i’m still on it, am i not…
call me human.