I am pissed at someone.
royally pissed. (so pissed, that I will even use capital I’s for this post.)
since this is my cave, I decided to spray paint the walls black and red for a little while… because I really need to blow off some steam.
let’s call this person The Smurf.
the smurf and I went roller skating… for about 3 years. It was great in the beginning – and I mean GREAT… you can’t imagine how much fun we had.
Then came the time where the smurf faced a really steep hill – one, the smurf had no option but to go down. I made sure the smurf didn’t fall too hard, took care of the smurf’s boo boo’s, applied more than enough band-aids for a lifetime and basically tried everything to keep the smurf off the concrete. it was fine. it was a pleasure for me to take care of the smurf – because I always thought that the smurf would do the same for me. the smurf did in the beginning… and i was happy.
the hill really was steep, but the smurf mastered it – bravely.
the smurf stayed off the ground.
recently, I had to discover that the smurf also looking out for me wasn’t true… not anymore. I got unstable, took a tumble and fell right on my butt, while the smurf stood idly by… not offering a hand, not even a word. while I had a fresh wound that needed patching up, the smurf was still too busy licking his old wounds and wallowing in the pain they caused.
I do know that some of the wounds the smurf suffered needed stitching and they still need time to heal… but I honestly have no idea how the smurf got so self-centred… and now ignores – and insults – the ones who care about the smurf, whom the smurf once deeply cared about.
sadly, the once so wonderful, caring and friendly smurf now looks like this:
and I am simply sick and tired of looking like this:
I can only hope the smurf will come back around, because underneath, the smurf is beautiful. until then, I will stay away… and let the smurf be grouchy.
if the smurf never comes back… well, so be it. nothing I can – and want to – do about it.
now, back to whitewashing my cave’s walls… maybe not white yet, but a brighter shade than black and red… until the storm clouds pass.
i will go now and tape my scowl away… hope i can find tape strong enough for that.
photo credits: internet